I ended up finishing 2nd in the 20$ Rebuy last night for 4.6k, which was great obviously, but it made me do some thinking.
Every time i feel I am playing well, building up big stacks etc, I end up failing. My last 3 big scores (14k in 55 cubed, 5k in 27 turbo, then this 4.6k in 20$ rebuy) have all been extremely lucky. They haven't been lucky as in me just playing awful and suck out after suck out per say, but in each tournament i was really short and ended up coming back.
In the 55 cubed, i was under 5 BBS with 2 tables left, for me to come back and win that, pretty lucky. In the 27 turbo i was down to under 2 BBS and came back from that, again, lucky. In the 20$ rebuy last night, I ended up losing a huge pot with about 50 left which left me with about 7 BBS, and again, I came back.
I feel like i played the 55 cubed FT very very badly, but managed to stay in it due to pure luck + coolers etc for sure. The 27.50 Turbo i played amazing, but I play those kind of FTS (every1 less than 20 bbs) day in day out, so that should be expected. and then last night in the 20$ rebuy, again, like the 55 cubed, it was a hard field, and I felt i got outplayed completely. There is so much I need to learn at the FT in MTTS. I came in 1/9 and I should have been the aggressor, but I let everyone walk all over me. Last night the FT was just super super aggro and I was folding to 4 bets like everytime, and wasn't picking up big hands etc, so i nitted up a ton. Luckily for me though these kids were putting in 30-60 BBS like it was their job and it allowed me to move up pay spot after pay spot. I literally had less chips heads up then when i started the FT with (came in 1/9, but still). I ended up doubling up quick in the HU match with JJ vs A4, and then got it in with A8 vs A6 for the CL, but he spiked a 6 and that was that.
Anyways, all I am saying is that I am hitting my big scores when i shouldn't, and I am not hitting big scores when I should, it is 100% backwards. I am not bitching, Ill obviously take the money, I just dont understand it at all.
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Monday, August 16, 2010
I hate hospitals
I started having pain in my stomach area, about 4 days ago. Saturday night i drink a couple beers, and i spent the whole night puking, and i just overall felt awful, I wasn't drunk, so i knew something was up.
So yesterday i wake up and the pain is worse, so i decide to go to the hospital after scaring myself to death reading on the internet about a strangulated hernia, which i thought i had because I do have a hernia, and the stuff i was going through was v similar to a hernia strangulation (vomiting, nausea, fever, etc)
So anyways, I was in the hospital 2 years ago for a appendectomy, and the memory i had pre surgery was just a lot of waiting, and of course the same thing happened again. I go in and waited like a hour to get registered, then another 2 hours for them to take me back, then another 30 minutes for a nurse to take my vitals and draw blood and make me pee in a cup. Then another hour for a doctor to see me, then another hour for them to take me to get a cat scan, then another 2 hours for them to come back with the results and tell me everything is normal and that I probably just have a virus or a gastrointestinal upset and that I should just go home and rest. I went in around 4pm, and I wasn't out of there till midnight, what a fucking joke. On the upside im just glad everything was fine, and luckily i have health insurance so all i am going to have to pay is 100$ for the ER visit.
So yea, i scared myself to death over something so dumb, thats the way i was a lot when i was younger, but I haven't been that way too much lately. But for whatever reason i scared myself to death over this. I should probably just get my hernia fixed, but after going through surgery 2 years ago its something that I do not want to do because it is just awful. Im sure ill man up sometime soon, but not now.
Anywho, this month has been going pretty decent in poker. I am winning money in sngs, which is great. I finally feel like i got my groove back, and I am up 3,500$ on just 340 games. I really need to put more hours in... playing the way I am now (6-10 tabling) wont get me a lot of volume, but 340 games is roughly 35-40 hours, which in 16 days is just unacceptable. If i treated it like a real job, I could be up double that so far, which is 3,500$, so im just burning money, and lots of it basically at this point.
MTTS have been going meh meh meh. I have built up stacks in a lot and I just haven't been able to close. MTT variance is the most brutal in anything you can do poker wise, so i just have to keep my head up. Only noteworthy score this month is 6th in the 109 turbo for 1g. I am currently still down about 1,500$ in MTTS thus far this month, but I will keep plugging away, especially on the weekends, to try to hit something big. With WCOOP right around the corner, I need to put a lot of volume in this month if i expect my game to be where I want it to be for the start of WCOOP in early September.
But yea, nothing too exciting going on right now
So yesterday i wake up and the pain is worse, so i decide to go to the hospital after scaring myself to death reading on the internet about a strangulated hernia, which i thought i had because I do have a hernia, and the stuff i was going through was v similar to a hernia strangulation (vomiting, nausea, fever, etc)
So anyways, I was in the hospital 2 years ago for a appendectomy, and the memory i had pre surgery was just a lot of waiting, and of course the same thing happened again. I go in and waited like a hour to get registered, then another 2 hours for them to take me back, then another 30 minutes for a nurse to take my vitals and draw blood and make me pee in a cup. Then another hour for a doctor to see me, then another hour for them to take me to get a cat scan, then another 2 hours for them to come back with the results and tell me everything is normal and that I probably just have a virus or a gastrointestinal upset and that I should just go home and rest. I went in around 4pm, and I wasn't out of there till midnight, what a fucking joke. On the upside im just glad everything was fine, and luckily i have health insurance so all i am going to have to pay is 100$ for the ER visit.
So yea, i scared myself to death over something so dumb, thats the way i was a lot when i was younger, but I haven't been that way too much lately. But for whatever reason i scared myself to death over this. I should probably just get my hernia fixed, but after going through surgery 2 years ago its something that I do not want to do because it is just awful. Im sure ill man up sometime soon, but not now.
Anywho, this month has been going pretty decent in poker. I am winning money in sngs, which is great. I finally feel like i got my groove back, and I am up 3,500$ on just 340 games. I really need to put more hours in... playing the way I am now (6-10 tabling) wont get me a lot of volume, but 340 games is roughly 35-40 hours, which in 16 days is just unacceptable. If i treated it like a real job, I could be up double that so far, which is 3,500$, so im just burning money, and lots of it basically at this point.
MTTS have been going meh meh meh. I have built up stacks in a lot and I just haven't been able to close. MTT variance is the most brutal in anything you can do poker wise, so i just have to keep my head up. Only noteworthy score this month is 6th in the 109 turbo for 1g. I am currently still down about 1,500$ in MTTS thus far this month, but I will keep plugging away, especially on the weekends, to try to hit something big. With WCOOP right around the corner, I need to put a lot of volume in this month if i expect my game to be where I want it to be for the start of WCOOP in early September.
But yea, nothing too exciting going on right now
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Been a good July thus far.
Been the best month of my year by far. Ill try to recap it best I can.
First, starting with RL shit, i went to see Tom petty last Saturday. Concerts never really appealed to me, and tbh this is the first real concert I have been too. It was soooooooo much fun and i regret turning down concert invites in the past from friends. Tom Petty has always been one of my fav bands and Im glad I got to see them, because they're getting pretty old and prob wont be doing this much longer. They were amazing.
Besides that, nothing really too exciting, just the same old stuff mostly. Had a few all day in the sun and pool drinking days, which are the best imo, but yea nothing too exciting.
About 2 weeks ago, I ended up going over a poker buddys house (eljay42 on stars) to grind. He lives like 30 minutes away from me and we have been tryin to meet up for a while, and it finally happened. Jcar9271 was also there, who is a 18 man grinder from Australia, but is in the USA for the summer just traveling city to city, which is awesome. It was the first time i ever grinded with other poker people in the same room before, and it was a interesting, and fun experience. Playing with other people in the same house really motivates you to play more, and its awesome to actually get to talk to people about poker while your playing, and have people share your beats and your suckouts etc. It also makes you play better I think. Eljay and Jcar were both really really cool people, and similar to myself. Laid back, sarcastic, etc. TBH i have this mentality that every online poker player I am going to meet is going to be very awkward and socially inexperienced, but all 3 that I have met so far (including Gonewiththedogs from a month ago) have been really really cool, and I think its very judgemental of me to think that way and I should probably stop that. But yea, was a awesome time, I ran bad as hell but eljay ended up making a somewhat deep run in the milly, and Jcar shipped the 5.50 rubix for 7k, and i had swap with them for 5% for any 4 digit score, so the extra 400$ reduced the variance a bit. Jcar will be back in town soon and we are planning on doing it again this upcoming Sunday, so should be fun again.
As far as poker goes, to start July i was playing / running soooooooooooo bad. I was down about 5k. I really reflected on my game though, and made some changes. SNG wise i really cut down the # of tables I am playing. I am used to 20-40 tabling, and it just has not been working for me. so i started to 6-10 table and I have seen waaaaaaaay better results. I feel I am finally playing great, and i expect this too continue. Here are my stats since i decided to switch it up
Frenzuh Click for details 220 $11 $18 64% $2,372
As far as MTTS go, i was down almost 4k in them earlier, but just one bink and your right in the black, and thats what I did. I ended up shipping the 27.50 turbo a few days ago for almost 5k, and i am ending the month up about 750$ in MTTS. I am not going to play anymore MTTS till August 1st over eljays.
But yea, poker has been a decent month, I am not up a ton per say, but I know what I am doing is going to increase my profit / results, and I am looking forward to seeing how much money there is to be made 6-10 tabling. After i get a decent sample, i will switch it to 12-16 tabling till I have a decent sample in that, and determine which is better for me for my optimal hourly.
Also grats to Msusyr24 for winning the first half of our prop bet. 2k is a lot of money to me, and it went right to him. He seems like hes super motivated going into the last stretch for this year, so i need to step up if i want any chance of winning, or at least doing damage control and winning the 2nd half. Worse comes to worse ill buy out at the end of september, but i really need to step it up.
But yea, thats it for now,
Nick
First, starting with RL shit, i went to see Tom petty last Saturday. Concerts never really appealed to me, and tbh this is the first real concert I have been too. It was soooooooo much fun and i regret turning down concert invites in the past from friends. Tom Petty has always been one of my fav bands and Im glad I got to see them, because they're getting pretty old and prob wont be doing this much longer. They were amazing.
Besides that, nothing really too exciting, just the same old stuff mostly. Had a few all day in the sun and pool drinking days, which are the best imo, but yea nothing too exciting.
About 2 weeks ago, I ended up going over a poker buddys house (eljay42 on stars) to grind. He lives like 30 minutes away from me and we have been tryin to meet up for a while, and it finally happened. Jcar9271 was also there, who is a 18 man grinder from Australia, but is in the USA for the summer just traveling city to city, which is awesome. It was the first time i ever grinded with other poker people in the same room before, and it was a interesting, and fun experience. Playing with other people in the same house really motivates you to play more, and its awesome to actually get to talk to people about poker while your playing, and have people share your beats and your suckouts etc. It also makes you play better I think. Eljay and Jcar were both really really cool people, and similar to myself. Laid back, sarcastic, etc. TBH i have this mentality that every online poker player I am going to meet is going to be very awkward and socially inexperienced, but all 3 that I have met so far (including Gonewiththedogs from a month ago) have been really really cool, and I think its very judgemental of me to think that way and I should probably stop that. But yea, was a awesome time, I ran bad as hell but eljay ended up making a somewhat deep run in the milly, and Jcar shipped the 5.50 rubix for 7k, and i had swap with them for 5% for any 4 digit score, so the extra 400$ reduced the variance a bit. Jcar will be back in town soon and we are planning on doing it again this upcoming Sunday, so should be fun again.
As far as poker goes, to start July i was playing / running soooooooooooo bad. I was down about 5k. I really reflected on my game though, and made some changes. SNG wise i really cut down the # of tables I am playing. I am used to 20-40 tabling, and it just has not been working for me. so i started to 6-10 table and I have seen waaaaaaaay better results. I feel I am finally playing great, and i expect this too continue. Here are my stats since i decided to switch it up
Frenzuh Click for details 220 $11 $18 64% $2,372
As far as MTTS go, i was down almost 4k in them earlier, but just one bink and your right in the black, and thats what I did. I ended up shipping the 27.50 turbo a few days ago for almost 5k, and i am ending the month up about 750$ in MTTS. I am not going to play anymore MTTS till August 1st over eljays.
But yea, poker has been a decent month, I am not up a ton per say, but I know what I am doing is going to increase my profit / results, and I am looking forward to seeing how much money there is to be made 6-10 tabling. After i get a decent sample, i will switch it to 12-16 tabling till I have a decent sample in that, and determine which is better for me for my optimal hourly.
Also grats to Msusyr24 for winning the first half of our prop bet. 2k is a lot of money to me, and it went right to him. He seems like hes super motivated going into the last stretch for this year, so i need to step up if i want any chance of winning, or at least doing damage control and winning the 2nd half. Worse comes to worse ill buy out at the end of september, but i really need to step it up.
But yea, thats it for now,
Nick
Monday, July 12, 2010
Month or so recap.
Last few weeks of my life poker wise have been going pretty well, and i can't really complain about life a whole lot either.
About 2 weeks ago i hit my biggest online score to date, I won the 55$ cubed on stars for 13,775$, on the same day I also got 2nd in the 44$ turbo for a little over 2k, as well as winning 1.5k in sngs.
I am still down in sngs the last couple of months, it has been mentally frustration, so I really needed this score to boost my confidence. I have been working a ton on my MTT game lately, and with the coaching from scaphism, it has been paying off. I have several 4 digit scores since i decided to get coaching, and to take MTT's more serious, and it has been the best decision in my poker career. There is so much dead money in MTTS its unbelieveable, and by the start of next year i really hope i set myself in a posistion to where I am not grinding out SNGS the way i am now.
All is not lost in SNGS though, i honestly feel like I know what is causing my breakeven stretch. It easily has to do with focus, and # of tables. I am a 18% ROI player in the 27-38's this year for 45's. I am one of the top earners in those games on stars, but i have been struggling with 45's. The reason is because when i play those games, either i move them aside and focus on them more if im mixing them along with 12's or w/e, or i am just playing those games with fewer tables. I am playing 6/12's sooooo robotic that its not even funny, and i am not giving enough credit to the new regs that play those games, and it is showing in my stats (a whopping 3% ROI for the year in 6/12's).
I am tired of being in makeup with my SNG backers, I am tired of letting them down month in month out. I haven't put a ton of volume in July yet, but i know i will, i feel as motivated as ever right now. I am actually looking forward to grinding, a feeling i haven't had in a long time.
Enough with online though.
Rivers casino opened up with table games on Thursday, and i must say i was both pleased and dissapointed with it, mostly dissapointment.
Heres my good n bad list about the place
Good
- Local live place 5 mins away
- Soft games
- Plenty of players
- Plenty of action, biggest game was 10/20 NLHE
- Free parking
Bad
- Dealers are awful, there were 2 dealers who would be accepted in any other casino basically, both were chicks.
- Rules are stupid, especially the no bet line. The travelling button rule is retarded too.
- Pay for drinks
It was very disorganized, which should be expected i guess in the first month or so. But hey, with games as soft as those, i cant really bitch, i just hope they get their shit straight asap. They don't have tournaments yet, which is a bummer, but i can't wait till they do, should be very very +ev fields. I ended up winning 300$ on thursday night, and i also went Saturday night too, but lost 400$ that night (AK of hearts < 104 of clubs (yes 10 fucking 4 lol) on a Q105 board, 10 and 5 of hearts, for a 600$ pot, all in on the flop, bricked turn river)
I also met gonetothedogs on Saturday, who is a member on parttimepoker.com. I have been on that site for a year and half now, and he was the first person i actually met from there in real life, so was a cool experience lol, and fwiw hes a really cool and great guy.
As far as life goes, im done with my rambling that i have done in the past. Life is good, life will always be good. Too many stories to fit into one blog post, so i wont bother.
One thing i am upset at myself with, is my weight though. I had a goal at the start of the year to be down to like 180 right now, and i am nowhere close. I have actually gained weight. I started to diet yesterday and i am calorie counting which is a pain in the ass. I am trying to stay around 1,500 calories each day for this week, and after the first week a lot of the water weight should be gone, so I will start to excercise a lot more, and increase my calories after that so i have energy. My lifestyle is just so unhealthy right now, eating a lot, not excercising, which causes me to sleep all the time and get bigger in the process. I need to change my lifestyle now or I am going to wakeup 1 year from now weighing almost 300 pounds.
But yea, I will def start to keep this blog more updated, especially with all this motivation i have been getting lately, def want to write all this stuff down on my progress with poker and with my life.
But thats it for now,
Nick
About 2 weeks ago i hit my biggest online score to date, I won the 55$ cubed on stars for 13,775$, on the same day I also got 2nd in the 44$ turbo for a little over 2k, as well as winning 1.5k in sngs.
I am still down in sngs the last couple of months, it has been mentally frustration, so I really needed this score to boost my confidence. I have been working a ton on my MTT game lately, and with the coaching from scaphism, it has been paying off. I have several 4 digit scores since i decided to get coaching, and to take MTT's more serious, and it has been the best decision in my poker career. There is so much dead money in MTTS its unbelieveable, and by the start of next year i really hope i set myself in a posistion to where I am not grinding out SNGS the way i am now.
All is not lost in SNGS though, i honestly feel like I know what is causing my breakeven stretch. It easily has to do with focus, and # of tables. I am a 18% ROI player in the 27-38's this year for 45's. I am one of the top earners in those games on stars, but i have been struggling with 45's. The reason is because when i play those games, either i move them aside and focus on them more if im mixing them along with 12's or w/e, or i am just playing those games with fewer tables. I am playing 6/12's sooooo robotic that its not even funny, and i am not giving enough credit to the new regs that play those games, and it is showing in my stats (a whopping 3% ROI for the year in 6/12's).
I am tired of being in makeup with my SNG backers, I am tired of letting them down month in month out. I haven't put a ton of volume in July yet, but i know i will, i feel as motivated as ever right now. I am actually looking forward to grinding, a feeling i haven't had in a long time.
Enough with online though.
Rivers casino opened up with table games on Thursday, and i must say i was both pleased and dissapointed with it, mostly dissapointment.
Heres my good n bad list about the place
Good
- Local live place 5 mins away
- Soft games
- Plenty of players
- Plenty of action, biggest game was 10/20 NLHE
- Free parking
Bad
- Dealers are awful, there were 2 dealers who would be accepted in any other casino basically, both were chicks.
- Rules are stupid, especially the no bet line. The travelling button rule is retarded too.
- Pay for drinks
It was very disorganized, which should be expected i guess in the first month or so. But hey, with games as soft as those, i cant really bitch, i just hope they get their shit straight asap. They don't have tournaments yet, which is a bummer, but i can't wait till they do, should be very very +ev fields. I ended up winning 300$ on thursday night, and i also went Saturday night too, but lost 400$ that night (AK of hearts < 104 of clubs (yes 10 fucking 4 lol) on a Q105 board, 10 and 5 of hearts, for a 600$ pot, all in on the flop, bricked turn river)
I also met gonetothedogs on Saturday, who is a member on parttimepoker.com. I have been on that site for a year and half now, and he was the first person i actually met from there in real life, so was a cool experience lol, and fwiw hes a really cool and great guy.
As far as life goes, im done with my rambling that i have done in the past. Life is good, life will always be good. Too many stories to fit into one blog post, so i wont bother.
One thing i am upset at myself with, is my weight though. I had a goal at the start of the year to be down to like 180 right now, and i am nowhere close. I have actually gained weight. I started to diet yesterday and i am calorie counting which is a pain in the ass. I am trying to stay around 1,500 calories each day for this week, and after the first week a lot of the water weight should be gone, so I will start to excercise a lot more, and increase my calories after that so i have energy. My lifestyle is just so unhealthy right now, eating a lot, not excercising, which causes me to sleep all the time and get bigger in the process. I need to change my lifestyle now or I am going to wakeup 1 year from now weighing almost 300 pounds.
But yea, I will def start to keep this blog more updated, especially with all this motivation i have been getting lately, def want to write all this stuff down on my progress with poker and with my life.
But thats it for now,
Nick
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Last month rant
It has been one month since my last post, which is way longer than i would hope, but oh well, ill try to recap 1 month in 1 blog post. A lot of downs, so this is going to sound like a rant than a actual well thought out post.
First off poker has been such a fucking grind, I am not making any money at all playing right now. I have been drinking / getting high a ton since i moved down in south side, a lot of the times by myself, and im worried about it TBH. I am playing fucked up a lot, or when im not fucked up im hungover from the night b4. I am not in the right mindset being down here.
Some of my friends have said "Your living the dream". They dont know shit. I agree being my own boss is awesome, but how can i expect to do that when all i want to do is play, and not work? Poker is just like any other job, its a grind, its boring, and to be the best at what you do it requires a great fucking work ethic which i do not have. I am currently down a little over 3 grand since the start of April. I am not reaching my 3k game quota for my salary deal, which means im making dog shit in SNGS. I bank around 500-700 a month in rakeback for SNGS, thats all i have been making the last 2 + months in SNGS, which is fucking pathetic.
However, for whatever reason, I am doing well in MTTS. I picked up a MTT coach (scaphism) and since then i have been doing decent. I am up 5k since the start of April in MTTS. I am running deeper a lot more often, and MTTS have so so so much more dead money in them than SNGS. If it was up to me i would quit my deal with draqqs PF group and just own dime low buyin SNGS, and just mostly work on my MTT game, because theres so much more money in MTTS than sngs.
But no, im over 5k in makeup to draqqs PF group, and i cant leave until i actually start winning. I am almost possitive once i get the makeup back, they will cut me. I have shown them 500$ profit in about 4 months, and im basically making their money sit. Eventually i will obviously win it back, but for now i am losing their money. So yea, dug a whole and now the next 5k i make will go to them, then once their breakeven i am 99% sure they will drop me.
I am putting in just enough effort into everything right now poker wise, and its pissing people off, its pissing me off. I am pissing off my backers for sucking, and i am pissing off my students off for sucking. Who wants to back somebody who loses money, who wants to be coached by some1 who is losing money?
My work ethic has really declined over the past few months, and its showing in everything i touch poker wise. I made a promise to myself on Friday that i would start to turn everything around Monday. I am going to start giving 150% and hopefully the results will speak for themselves.
I am also going to start actually using my gym membership to start to lose some weight (currently weigh 215 pounds). With the life style of drinking 2 cases a week and not excercising at all, obv gaining weight is going to happen.
But enough with that rant.
As far as life goes, i am still unhappy right now. Me performing so poorly in poker has caused me to not be as upbeat outside of poker. That is why i am changing my ways mostly, to have a happier life. I dont really give a fuck about money, and could be happy broke as long as i loved the job i did, but sadly with poker, you aren't happy if you lose money, because losing money means you are not beating the games. And just like any game, whether it be a sport, or a video game (at least for me) , it is no fun at all to lose.
To make it worse, i don't think i am going to make it out to vegas, which sucks. With me sucking the last couple months at my job, and me running into bank problems, etc, it has caused me to be somewhat tight on money. i still have a ton invested online in players (almost 10k) but sadly i am unable to cash that money out. I have about 3 months of bills / expenses saved up and it would be so dumb / degen to go to vegas and blow that and then have no bill money.
Anyways, i made a small withdrawl today from stars using echecks. I depo'd 20$ and it cleared today so i was able to cash out using it. I should have the money by tuesday - wednesday in my bank account. Every1 says im fine, but with what happened with me at PNC im expecting to get a call tommorow or tuesday asking where the money is coming from, etc. And then they deny it and i have to go find another new bank and start over, and keep cashing checks out and cashing them at walmart (which blows btw). Hopefully everything is fine though, because a wired cashout that takes 2-3 days is a lot more convient then cashing out checks that take 1-7 days to process, and another 5-15 days to get mailed to me.
Anyways, im done with this rant, going to bed, tomorrow is the day for change
Nick~
First off poker has been such a fucking grind, I am not making any money at all playing right now. I have been drinking / getting high a ton since i moved down in south side, a lot of the times by myself, and im worried about it TBH. I am playing fucked up a lot, or when im not fucked up im hungover from the night b4. I am not in the right mindset being down here.
Some of my friends have said "Your living the dream". They dont know shit. I agree being my own boss is awesome, but how can i expect to do that when all i want to do is play, and not work? Poker is just like any other job, its a grind, its boring, and to be the best at what you do it requires a great fucking work ethic which i do not have. I am currently down a little over 3 grand since the start of April. I am not reaching my 3k game quota for my salary deal, which means im making dog shit in SNGS. I bank around 500-700 a month in rakeback for SNGS, thats all i have been making the last 2 + months in SNGS, which is fucking pathetic.
However, for whatever reason, I am doing well in MTTS. I picked up a MTT coach (scaphism) and since then i have been doing decent. I am up 5k since the start of April in MTTS. I am running deeper a lot more often, and MTTS have so so so much more dead money in them than SNGS. If it was up to me i would quit my deal with draqqs PF group and just own dime low buyin SNGS, and just mostly work on my MTT game, because theres so much more money in MTTS than sngs.
But no, im over 5k in makeup to draqqs PF group, and i cant leave until i actually start winning. I am almost possitive once i get the makeup back, they will cut me. I have shown them 500$ profit in about 4 months, and im basically making their money sit. Eventually i will obviously win it back, but for now i am losing their money. So yea, dug a whole and now the next 5k i make will go to them, then once their breakeven i am 99% sure they will drop me.
I am putting in just enough effort into everything right now poker wise, and its pissing people off, its pissing me off. I am pissing off my backers for sucking, and i am pissing off my students off for sucking. Who wants to back somebody who loses money, who wants to be coached by some1 who is losing money?
My work ethic has really declined over the past few months, and its showing in everything i touch poker wise. I made a promise to myself on Friday that i would start to turn everything around Monday. I am going to start giving 150% and hopefully the results will speak for themselves.
I am also going to start actually using my gym membership to start to lose some weight (currently weigh 215 pounds). With the life style of drinking 2 cases a week and not excercising at all, obv gaining weight is going to happen.
But enough with that rant.
As far as life goes, i am still unhappy right now. Me performing so poorly in poker has caused me to not be as upbeat outside of poker. That is why i am changing my ways mostly, to have a happier life. I dont really give a fuck about money, and could be happy broke as long as i loved the job i did, but sadly with poker, you aren't happy if you lose money, because losing money means you are not beating the games. And just like any game, whether it be a sport, or a video game (at least for me) , it is no fun at all to lose.
To make it worse, i don't think i am going to make it out to vegas, which sucks. With me sucking the last couple months at my job, and me running into bank problems, etc, it has caused me to be somewhat tight on money. i still have a ton invested online in players (almost 10k) but sadly i am unable to cash that money out. I have about 3 months of bills / expenses saved up and it would be so dumb / degen to go to vegas and blow that and then have no bill money.
Anyways, i made a small withdrawl today from stars using echecks. I depo'd 20$ and it cleared today so i was able to cash out using it. I should have the money by tuesday - wednesday in my bank account. Every1 says im fine, but with what happened with me at PNC im expecting to get a call tommorow or tuesday asking where the money is coming from, etc. And then they deny it and i have to go find another new bank and start over, and keep cashing checks out and cashing them at walmart (which blows btw). Hopefully everything is fine though, because a wired cashout that takes 2-3 days is a lot more convient then cashing out checks that take 1-7 days to process, and another 5-15 days to get mailed to me.
Anyways, im done with this rant, going to bed, tomorrow is the day for change
Nick~
Friday, May 14, 2010
Life is sucking
Well not really, but its been a hard few weeks.
To continue on the bank situation, i went into PNC a few days after the incident, and bitched them out for a few minutes and closed my account there. I looked around for a Bank of America around Pittsburgh to be my new bank, but i found out that all of the locations i found on goggle, have been closed for a couple years, and that there is no BOA around Pittsburgh, or at least the part of Pittsburgh i am from. I ended up choosing a small local bank in the South hills of Pittsburgh, so hopefully its better. Just got my checks and debit card, going to deposit onto Poker Stars with echecks tomorrow, and then sometime early next week i should be able to cash out with echecks directly into my bank. Takes 1-2 business days for the funds to get into my bank, so im crossing my fingers that everything goes smoothly and my new bank does not give me problems, because i do not want to deal with this again. In the meantime, i have been mailing checks, and cashing them at walmart. Walmart is a beautiful thing. I will probably use both echecks, and cashing checks at walmart for about a month, just incase my bank decides to be gay and refuse the money because the activity is "suspicious". As far as walmart goes, they could give a fuck, so its nice knowing i always have the option to cash checks at walmart.
Life hasn't been too exciting lately, my good friends are getting way too old for their age imo. We had a big party this past Saturday, where we had around 20 people over, and partied till 4 AM, had a ton of fun, and had 4 people call the cops for noise complaints, etc, but those kind of nights will happen maybe once a month or two, and i want to do that shit 2 times a week (minus the noise complaints obv).
But yea, were all 22-24 years old, most coming right out of college, and they are all settling down already. Every single one of my best friends, with 1 exception who is up at PSU all year, is involved in a serious serious relationship. Most have real day jobs now, working the 9-5, and spending the majority of their free time with their GFS. No1 wants to go out and party all night anymore, there all in relationships now so when we do drink its always at some1's house playing NHL or something because they dont feel the need to go to a bar because they dont want to talk to chicks anymore, and its too expensive, etc. And when we do go to a bar its some dive bar to play pool or sit and watch TV or something. No strip clubs, no dance clubs, just old men bars.
Im not sure if they are growing up too fast, or if im growing up too slow. I dont know if its because they have "real jobs" and GFS, and i dont. I don't know what the reason is, all i know is they are all content with settling down, and i am not ready to settle down, and it sucks that all of my best friends are not on board with me. I am 23 years old, who the fuck wants to settle down at 23? I am not going to be able to make it out to vegas for the whole month of June, due to the bank problems + my DUI classes, but i need to get out there for a week or two, i really need it.
As far as poker goes, its just adding to the pile of things that i am not happy with. I am down almost 2 grand since the start of April in SNGS. I ended up losing a couple hundred in april, and i am down like 1,500 in May so far. I am running so fucking bad. I am looking over my HH's about 2-3 times a week, and i am honestly playing fine each session. I get 2-3 outted so much, cant win flips, cant win 60/40's... nothing at all is working out for me. I have been lucky with not hitting the bad bad side of variance, ever, and now i am experiencing it. I keep grinding each day, i cant bitch, i just got to grind through it.
On the bright side of things, i picked up a MTT coach, Scaphism (joemac17 on stars).
I have had 1 session with him so far, and it was awesome to listen to him explain his thought process behind hands, and just hearing a pro MTT player talk about MTTS in general was awesome. In the 1 session i felt i learned a ton, and cant wait to own MTTS soon. I am down like 500$ so far in May in MTTS, which isn't too bad considering i have played a lot of MTTS. I have FT'd a couple MTTS, gone to final 2 tables in a couple more, getting rlly close to 5k+ scores etc, just unable to close it out etc. But yea, hopefully my game progresses the way i want it too with scaph's help, and i can become a very solid MTT player, cuz the hourly in MTT's fucking owns the hourly in SNGS. Would be so much more money for me in the long run if i got really good at them.
To end this horrible ramble of a blog post, i am going to need to add on to the ramble.
I went over my parents for Mothers day Sunday. Out dog chance looked awful, was walking into walls, pissing on the floor, and what hit me the hardest was, he didn't even recognize me anymore. Hes been deaf for about 3 years now, and has had impartial cataracts in his eyes for about 2 years. But he always wagged his tail and still recognized me and showed me love. It really hit me hard to see him like that, hes been in life since i can remember, was a part of nearly all of my child hood, and there he is, in front of my eyes, dying.
My mom and myself were the only two people who ever cared about him, my other two brothers, and especially my dad, never liked him. So obviously at the dinner table, My mom and myself talked about him while they just carried on. My dad actually made a joke about it, and i flipped on him for a good minute. My dad can be such a asshole sometimes.
She said she was going to put him down for his 16th birthday on May 26th, if he makes it that far. I agreed and said theres no way he should live like this, he cant even see anymore. So hopefully he makes it till then, and My mom and me will go to the vet to get him put down. Im pretty emotional about it, and dont know how im going to handle myself when it actually happens. But i would hate myself if i wasn't there for it, so ill just be a man like im supposed too and hopefully hide the emotions in front of my mom.
But yea, hopefully future posts arent this depressing, im usually optimistic + care free + full of fun etc. I will always love living life, and even though my life is pretty miserable right now, my spirits are still high, as they always will be. Hopefully shit just turns around in a lot of the shit in my life, thats all.
To continue on the bank situation, i went into PNC a few days after the incident, and bitched them out for a few minutes and closed my account there. I looked around for a Bank of America around Pittsburgh to be my new bank, but i found out that all of the locations i found on goggle, have been closed for a couple years, and that there is no BOA around Pittsburgh, or at least the part of Pittsburgh i am from. I ended up choosing a small local bank in the South hills of Pittsburgh, so hopefully its better. Just got my checks and debit card, going to deposit onto Poker Stars with echecks tomorrow, and then sometime early next week i should be able to cash out with echecks directly into my bank. Takes 1-2 business days for the funds to get into my bank, so im crossing my fingers that everything goes smoothly and my new bank does not give me problems, because i do not want to deal with this again. In the meantime, i have been mailing checks, and cashing them at walmart. Walmart is a beautiful thing. I will probably use both echecks, and cashing checks at walmart for about a month, just incase my bank decides to be gay and refuse the money because the activity is "suspicious". As far as walmart goes, they could give a fuck, so its nice knowing i always have the option to cash checks at walmart.
Life hasn't been too exciting lately, my good friends are getting way too old for their age imo. We had a big party this past Saturday, where we had around 20 people over, and partied till 4 AM, had a ton of fun, and had 4 people call the cops for noise complaints, etc, but those kind of nights will happen maybe once a month or two, and i want to do that shit 2 times a week (minus the noise complaints obv).
But yea, were all 22-24 years old, most coming right out of college, and they are all settling down already. Every single one of my best friends, with 1 exception who is up at PSU all year, is involved in a serious serious relationship. Most have real day jobs now, working the 9-5, and spending the majority of their free time with their GFS. No1 wants to go out and party all night anymore, there all in relationships now so when we do drink its always at some1's house playing NHL or something because they dont feel the need to go to a bar because they dont want to talk to chicks anymore, and its too expensive, etc. And when we do go to a bar its some dive bar to play pool or sit and watch TV or something. No strip clubs, no dance clubs, just old men bars.
Im not sure if they are growing up too fast, or if im growing up too slow. I dont know if its because they have "real jobs" and GFS, and i dont. I don't know what the reason is, all i know is they are all content with settling down, and i am not ready to settle down, and it sucks that all of my best friends are not on board with me. I am 23 years old, who the fuck wants to settle down at 23? I am not going to be able to make it out to vegas for the whole month of June, due to the bank problems + my DUI classes, but i need to get out there for a week or two, i really need it.
As far as poker goes, its just adding to the pile of things that i am not happy with. I am down almost 2 grand since the start of April in SNGS. I ended up losing a couple hundred in april, and i am down like 1,500 in May so far. I am running so fucking bad. I am looking over my HH's about 2-3 times a week, and i am honestly playing fine each session. I get 2-3 outted so much, cant win flips, cant win 60/40's... nothing at all is working out for me. I have been lucky with not hitting the bad bad side of variance, ever, and now i am experiencing it. I keep grinding each day, i cant bitch, i just got to grind through it.
On the bright side of things, i picked up a MTT coach, Scaphism (joemac17 on stars).
I have had 1 session with him so far, and it was awesome to listen to him explain his thought process behind hands, and just hearing a pro MTT player talk about MTTS in general was awesome. In the 1 session i felt i learned a ton, and cant wait to own MTTS soon. I am down like 500$ so far in May in MTTS, which isn't too bad considering i have played a lot of MTTS. I have FT'd a couple MTTS, gone to final 2 tables in a couple more, getting rlly close to 5k+ scores etc, just unable to close it out etc. But yea, hopefully my game progresses the way i want it too with scaph's help, and i can become a very solid MTT player, cuz the hourly in MTT's fucking owns the hourly in SNGS. Would be so much more money for me in the long run if i got really good at them.
To end this horrible ramble of a blog post, i am going to need to add on to the ramble.
I went over my parents for Mothers day Sunday. Out dog chance looked awful, was walking into walls, pissing on the floor, and what hit me the hardest was, he didn't even recognize me anymore. Hes been deaf for about 3 years now, and has had impartial cataracts in his eyes for about 2 years. But he always wagged his tail and still recognized me and showed me love. It really hit me hard to see him like that, hes been in life since i can remember, was a part of nearly all of my child hood, and there he is, in front of my eyes, dying.
My mom and myself were the only two people who ever cared about him, my other two brothers, and especially my dad, never liked him. So obviously at the dinner table, My mom and myself talked about him while they just carried on. My dad actually made a joke about it, and i flipped on him for a good minute. My dad can be such a asshole sometimes.
She said she was going to put him down for his 16th birthday on May 26th, if he makes it that far. I agreed and said theres no way he should live like this, he cant even see anymore. So hopefully he makes it till then, and My mom and me will go to the vet to get him put down. Im pretty emotional about it, and dont know how im going to handle myself when it actually happens. But i would hate myself if i wasn't there for it, so ill just be a man like im supposed too and hopefully hide the emotions in front of my mom.
But yea, hopefully future posts arent this depressing, im usually optimistic + care free + full of fun etc. I will always love living life, and even though my life is pretty miserable right now, my spirits are still high, as they always will be. Hopefully shit just turns around in a lot of the shit in my life, thats all.
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
So fucking pissed right now.
I get my pokerstars check yesterday, i go to cash it this morning.
When i hand the teller my deposit slip + check, she questions it about 15 seconds later, asking who issued this, and why is it from the royal bank of canada.
I respond that all of my checks in the past have been from the RBC, i don't understand.
To make a long story short, they threatened to freeze my account if they did not know the company that issued the check, so i told them a poker site (Dumbest thing i could have done, but i had no idea what the fuck to say, and i was nervous as hell)
They deposited the check, told me to have a good day, and i thought that would be the end of it.
wrong.
I get a call about 2 hours later from my bank.
"Hi nick, im calling about the check you deposited today, its no good"
im like what??????
"yea this check is fraud, and we can not deposit it for you"
At this point i start questioning why etc, and they give me some bullshit excuse about how its different then the RBC checks, even though i have deposited a dozen others that look just like it. She then tells me about how online gambling is illegal, and that if i tried to deposit another check that my account would be closed.
So i told her that the UIGEA has not kicked in yet, and its only illegal to deposit onto a online gambling site, which i have not done, and that it is perfectly legal to withdrawl money from a online gambling site and deposit it into a bank until the UIGEA goes into effect, which isnt until June.
She didnt really know what to say, she just repeats herself and says the check is fraud, and that if i tried to deposit another one that my account would be closed.
So yea, a 2,200 check not cashed, and PNC threatening me about cashing in those checks period. I understand your the 5th largest USA bank, and you have a lot to lose in the situation, but come on the UIGEA isn't even in effect yet.
Im not as mad at them as i am at myself, i should have just told them i work for a guy in canada and i do stuff for him on the internet and he pays me through the RBC. But no, im a fucking moron, and had to tell them the truth. Theres no fucking way they could ever trace it to online gambling if i just lied, im a fucking idiot.
I emailed stars to try to get this resolved about a hour n half ago, they forwarded the email to the cashier specialist, and i am still waiting to hear back from them. Hopefully they can just reimburse me my 2,200, cancel the check, i can open up a account at a new bank, poker friends are recommending a small local bank, close out my PNC account, and i can be on my fucking way.
I did not do anything illegal, and i have to put up with this bullshit. Im going to be smarter about this in the future and probably will have my money spread out between 3 banks, 1 just for cashing checks, one for savings, and one as a checking account. Writing checks to myself from my poker account to my other 2 bank accounts. All at different banks. With the USA being as retarded as they are when it comes to online gambling, i have to make sure my money is safe so they and the banks cant fuck with my life.
Sigh...
End of this rant, sorry for the poor grammar, thats how i type when im pissed.
Ill Post when i find out more from Stars, hopefully they aren't pissed and this can get resolved easily.
When i hand the teller my deposit slip + check, she questions it about 15 seconds later, asking who issued this, and why is it from the royal bank of canada.
I respond that all of my checks in the past have been from the RBC, i don't understand.
To make a long story short, they threatened to freeze my account if they did not know the company that issued the check, so i told them a poker site (Dumbest thing i could have done, but i had no idea what the fuck to say, and i was nervous as hell)
They deposited the check, told me to have a good day, and i thought that would be the end of it.
wrong.
I get a call about 2 hours later from my bank.
"Hi nick, im calling about the check you deposited today, its no good"
im like what??????
"yea this check is fraud, and we can not deposit it for you"
At this point i start questioning why etc, and they give me some bullshit excuse about how its different then the RBC checks, even though i have deposited a dozen others that look just like it. She then tells me about how online gambling is illegal, and that if i tried to deposit another check that my account would be closed.
So i told her that the UIGEA has not kicked in yet, and its only illegal to deposit onto a online gambling site, which i have not done, and that it is perfectly legal to withdrawl money from a online gambling site and deposit it into a bank until the UIGEA goes into effect, which isnt until June.
She didnt really know what to say, she just repeats herself and says the check is fraud, and that if i tried to deposit another one that my account would be closed.
So yea, a 2,200 check not cashed, and PNC threatening me about cashing in those checks period. I understand your the 5th largest USA bank, and you have a lot to lose in the situation, but come on the UIGEA isn't even in effect yet.
Im not as mad at them as i am at myself, i should have just told them i work for a guy in canada and i do stuff for him on the internet and he pays me through the RBC. But no, im a fucking moron, and had to tell them the truth. Theres no fucking way they could ever trace it to online gambling if i just lied, im a fucking idiot.
I emailed stars to try to get this resolved about a hour n half ago, they forwarded the email to the cashier specialist, and i am still waiting to hear back from them. Hopefully they can just reimburse me my 2,200, cancel the check, i can open up a account at a new bank, poker friends are recommending a small local bank, close out my PNC account, and i can be on my fucking way.
I did not do anything illegal, and i have to put up with this bullshit. Im going to be smarter about this in the future and probably will have my money spread out between 3 banks, 1 just for cashing checks, one for savings, and one as a checking account. Writing checks to myself from my poker account to my other 2 bank accounts. All at different banks. With the USA being as retarded as they are when it comes to online gambling, i have to make sure my money is safe so they and the banks cant fuck with my life.
Sigh...
End of this rant, sorry for the poor grammar, thats how i type when im pissed.
Ill Post when i find out more from Stars, hopefully they aren't pissed and this can get resolved easily.
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